I know it can be a little bit cliché to write a good ol’ how to find your g-spot article. But I’m going to do it anyway, because vaginal orgasm and ultimately g-spot orgasm can be one of the most vitalising and energising experiences we can give to ourselves.
How we experience these kinds of orgasms will be different to an external clitoral orgasm. There is no right or wrong, better or worse, we just explore and label possibilities and really just leave it up to loving and sexy discovery, that makes us feel alive.
It’s also one of the most frequently asked questions I receive.
Your G-spot and how to access it:
The location of the g-spot is on the front, (anterior) top wall of the vagina.
The g-spot varies in size from woman to woman.
A recent discovery actually located the g-spot in a cadaver and found that it is a small sac of erectile tissues located in the anterior vaginal wall.
Around the g-spot feels like the roof of your mouth - that front, ribbed section.
Other research suggests that the nerve endings that sit between the urethral sponge and in the wall of the vagina vary in size and amount for each woman. The amount of vaginal wall surrounding the nerve endings will impact accessibility and how easily the woman can be stimulated. If your nerve endings sit closer to the wall and your wall is thinner than the woman next to you, you'll probably find g-spot stimulation is easier for you.
Stimulating the g-spot:
To stimulate the g-spot with the fingers, use the pointer and middle finger together in a come hither motion.
Massage this front wall, taking your time with your come hither motion. Don’t go really hard and fast as this will not serve you or your partner.
Having a strong pelvic floor is important to make the g-spot orgasm more accessible, and to strengthen in preparation for childbirth. A stronger pelvic floor will also aid in recovery after childbirth.
You can strengthen your pelvic floor by using Ami beads, doing yoga or pilates. A strong pelvic floor is really important for general health and wellbeing too. It's just as important however to be able to relax your pelvic floor. The best way i've found to explore pelvic floor health is to see a specialist in this area. We recommend Ali Harding (Melbourne).
You can use a g-spot sex toy to increase access to the area.
Try different positions during sex. If the woman or person with a g-spot is on top they have more control over what feels good, and it’s often easier to reach the front wall and their g-spot. Another position to try is for the person with the g-spot to lay down on their stomach and the partner behind her. Penetration from behind is a great way to access the g-spot.
Place pressure on your pubic mound during penetration, this will add a little pressure to the g-spot from a different angle. Even try massaging the pubic mound with your hands, or get your partner to do this. Rub it side to side. Essentially you can experiment with different movements and see what happens.
Practice belly breathing.
Focus on the physical sensations during sex. Clench your pelvic floor to create heightened awareness in the vagina and the surrounding areas.
Remember, to take the pressure off during sex
Yes, we all like to know how to improve our sex lives and get closure to our partners. It's a great idea to try and not to be goal orientated and just enjoy the experience of intimacy right from the get go. Having a goal is okay if you’re not always working towards it, but enjoying sex and intimacy for what it is. Intimacy is a chance to get connected, get the endorphins flowing, feel alive, sexy and vital and to communicate physically with someone else.
The more you form a relationship with your vagina the more responsive it will become.